WaPo Slams Bojangles Biscuits, Insert Trite Thom Tillis

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Washington Post recently conducted taste tests of ‘fast food’ biscuits and published rankings that placed Bojangles’ second to last and compared them to eating baking soda. The sacrilege elicited sneers from those that know the truth, but can understand why the purported connoisseurs at a liberal rag like WaPo would have an aversion to the famous chicken and biscuits born and breaded in the the Old North State.

Here’s what they wrote about the biscuits that just edged out those from Burger King in their rankings:

“Good crisp on the outside. Good salt levels. Not very light and fluffy. There’s a little crispness and contrast between the outer and interior textures. Very salty, not very flaky. Meh. Not a good biscuit! Kind of a burned taste, but it looks perfectly golden! So many carbs, so little flavor. It’s crying out for jam, jelly, anything to distract from the bland-yet-fluffy body. I can taste leavening in this; it tastes like baking soda.”

Well guess what, WaPo? We’ll be glad for you to forgo trips to Bojangles in the future – more for us.

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Bojangles was just as gracious in the face of such insulting treatment as you would expect:

“Our incredible fans often tell us how much they crave Bojangles’ delicious buttermilk biscuits. However, we realize made-from-scratch biscuits aren’t for everyone. We genuinely thank the Washington Post for including us, and we invite these taste-testers back to Bojangles’ anytime.”

However, the ink barely dried on the biscuit blasphemy before a reliable spotlight hog that (falsely) claims to represent North Carolina values inserted himself into the controversy – Sen. Thom Tillis.

 


Now, Tillis is a proud RINO that has had more success in organizing costume parties for dogs on Capitol Hill and selling out conservatives to hold hands with Democrats in his fight for amnesty for illegal aliens, than actually standing for conservative principles he campaigned on.

Tillis is a status-seeking Establishment hack, so it should come as no surprise that he takes a stand for Bojangles in order to get noticed, but can’t bring himself to actually take a stand for the people that eat there in his capacity as a United States Senator.

After all, who eats at Bojangles? Well for the most part the patrons of the fine establishment that saturates the highways and byways across North Carolina, being founded in Charlotte in 1977, are red-blooded Americans with conservative values.

Not so sure Tillis really deserves that Southern Fried greasy-goodness, but maybe if he eats enough of it he’ll change his thinking on that RINO Pride his likes to wear on his sleeve?

Moreover, with Bojangles’ ambitious expansion plans, maybe the entire country can soon be sated to the point of advancing conservative principles from sea to shining sea? One can only hope…Bojangles, anybody?

 

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